I am a new woman!

I feel great today.  Guess what?  Samuel slept 5 hours last night.  We put him down at 9 and when I heard noise from the monitor, I looked at the clock and holy shit it was 2 am.  Now before I told you that I thought my boobs were rock hard and huge, well that was nothing compared to last night.  All I heard from him was a little peep, not crying or anything.  I laid in bed for another 15 minutes, just listening to him making tiny noises and hoping that he would wake up soon, so I could relieve my breasts.  Finally I couldn't take it anymore and I went into this room.  He was just looking around, so I got him up and fed him on one boob and changed him and then tried to feed him on the other boob and he just was too freaking tired to eat.  So I put him back to bed, headed downstairs and pumped the other boob.  I got back to bed by 3.  Then guess what he slept until a little after 6.  Dave got him out of bed, changed him and I fed him in bed.  He again barely ate and fell back asleep until 8:45 am.

So then we come to the rest of the firsts that Samuel has done for the day.  I woke up at 8:45 to a huge explosion coming from Samuel's pants.  My knees were up in the fetal position, so I was kind of surrounding Samuel with one side of my body in our bed.  My thighs were resting just below his bottom.  I felt the explosion on my legs.  Then he started smiling like crazy and I knew this was going to be a very dirty diaper.  I took him downstairs so I could change him and feed him.

I was wondering why his back was so warm as I was walking downstairs and I soon found out.  He had pooped all the way up his back.  Now that was a serious explosion!  He got poop all over his pj's, his back, etc.  It was disgusting.  Now, by this time he was ravenous, so he was screaming at the top of his lungs and did not like the fact that I was trying to pull his pj's off of him without getting poop everywhere, including his hair, the changing table, you know everything.  

I finally got him all cleaned up and started to feed him.  He again ate at ton off of one of my boobs for a good 10 to 15 minutes.  Then he started screaming.  I figured he probably needed to burp.  Well, not only did he need to burp, he needed to expel about 1 oz of breast milk all over my chest, tank top, and pj bottoms.  Then he rewarded me with another gigantic poop in his pants.  So back to the changing table we went.  This time he was only wearing his diaper, so that was an easy diaper change.  By this time he was pretty happy with himself, so he just smiled at me while I changed him.  I tried to go back feeding him on the other boob and he didn't want to having anything to do with that again.  So he went in his bouncy seat and I went back to the pumper.  

You think I am done, oh no, just read on...

I took him upstairs to finally put him in his outfit for the day.  I figured all the bodily functions were done for a while.  Since he threw up all over me, I needed to get changed and then I wanted to wipe him down.  I went to get a wash cloth, I wiped everything off of him and put him in a new outfit.  I put him in his bouncy seat so I could take him in the other room so I could get dressed.  I went to the bathroom to squeeze out the wash cloth I just just on him, came back into his room looked at him and he exploded throw up all over him, his new outfit, in his ear, all over his hair (I have no idea how it got to all those places, but it was everywhere).  

So I went back to get the wash cloth, stripped him down, washed him off and put him in another outfit.  This time it was a success.  Thank goodness.  I was able to wash my face, put on clothes and put in a load of laundry.  

Now we are baby bjorning it and he is asleep on my chest.  I have spent a good 38 minutes checking email and writing here and he is still asleep.  

I am totally prepared to get peed on today.  I mean what else could happen.  It is a good thing he gave me lots of sleep last night.  I think I can handle anything today.  

We have a lunch date at 11:30, so hopefully he will behave himself.  

That is it for the day.